Trailer Park King Review

Trailer Park King Review

Nov 26, 2013

The portrayal of people in media has been a hot topic as of late, especially with egregious misrepresentations of any protected classes in anything from TV to games to advertisements. One would think with this being a hot topic that a game which pretty much paints every single character in the worst stereotypical light possible, should be going through the ringer. However, you’d be dead wrong.

Trailer Park King, originally enjoying success as a XBLIG title some time back, is one of those games at first glance that looks like a dud. This title involves the story of the most stereotypical “white trash” redneck who is framed for murder after a date gone bad. Throughout the trials and tribulations of the protagonist named King, you will run into a myriad of scantily clad women, sexual innuendos and more stereotypes than you can imagine. With all that in mind, this point and click title is sure to anger a few people.


Be as it may, Trailer Park King itself is an entertaining and well done puzzle adventure title. While one could easily label this a sexist title, no actual sex happens within the game. Instead, a path of puzzles in order to clear your main character for a murder he was framed for are laced within the threads of the noticeable cleavage and portrayal of dumb yokels. The controls are fairly simple, being that it’s a point and click adventure title as well, with almost every game control involving a tap of the controller. The sleuthing, however, is still up to the player.

Anyone who remembers Al Lowe games from the 90s such as Leisure Suit Larry or Freddy Pharkas: Frontier Pharmacist, will appreciate the immature, toilet-bowl humor that Trailer Park King uses. It’s the thing that is either the selling point or the turn off for this title, depending on which camp you subscribe to. If you enjoy adult humor, and can take a joke, no matter who you are, you’ll get a kick out of the humor and atmosphere of this title.


There will be a ring of controversy surrounding this title, regarding its treatment of women, or painting those who reside in trailer parks as dumb hillbillies. But it’d be a dull world if everyone had the same sense of humor. Trailer Park King doesn’t do any one thing particularly amazing, but what it does do is give people an opportunity to smile like an immature 14 year old, no matter their actual physical age, while also using their head to solve puzzles. It’s nothing worse than what you see in games such as Grand Theft Auto, and something a lot more tame than most movies people go to nowadays. A throwback to the days when PC was king, Trailer Park King is a point and click adventure that’s both fun and crude all in one.

Battle Command Review

Battle Command Review

Nov 25, 2013

Battle Command, now on Google Play thanks to the fine folks at Spacetime Games, is a little piece of nostalgia bundled with some great graphics. This title feels like an old throwback to the days of the first StarCraft game, back before the days of legitimate internet multiplayer. It’s a title that involves a little fortress building, a tiny bit of tower defense, resource management and of course, wanton destruction.


There’s lots of opportunities to fight things, deploy combat and be a rough and rugged commander in Battle Command. For starters, there is the single player campaign, which pits the player against a series of challenges against an evil despot. There’s also a PvP and “War Games” (test out the defenses of your own base by attacking it) options, should single player bore one. However, the PvP itself doesn’t warrant a “true” multiplayer experience, instead finding yourself attacking someone’s base with whatever defenses they’ve set up, but not their actual input or soldiers to change the tide of battle.

Still, Battle Command is a highly entertaining mobile take on such games as StarCraft, where strategy and resource management come into play. This title however, is also free to play, meaning there is in-game currency that can either slowly be earned through grinding or purchased for a reasonable rate. These purple crystals, or whatever it is they are, allow players to speed up production of buildings and units.


From a graphics standpoint, Battle Command is a pretty impressive game. It doesn’t have the most intense graphics, but this title is illustrated a little more serious than other war games like Rubicon’s Little War Game or similar battle strategy titles. Battle Command in general takes itself a little more serious all around, though it isn’t extremely heavy or gritty either; this title finds the perfect balance in its tone.

Battle Command is a highly entertaining title which plays a lot like games such as Starcraft. Players will reminisce about the original Blizzard title while engrossed in the awesome battle gameplay that Spacetime Games has given folks on mobile devices. While there isn’t a strong multiplayer element to this title, the rest of the game will suck players in, having them scream for more as they come back time and time again for more battles to command.

Huebrix Review

Huebrix Review

Sep 20, 2012

Huebrix, the new puzzle game from Yellow Monkey Studios and launched on Android by NoodleCake Studios, is at its heart a game of drawing lines. There’s a grid composed of squares, with the blocks of different colors. The goal? Expand out the squares, based on the number in their starting postion, to fill the entire grid. The cliche would be to say “sounds simple, right? But it really isn’t!” It’s true, but what puzzle game really is as simple as it sounds? There’s always some aspect or hook that makes it more difficult or deeper than it should be. There always is. And here, the fact that there are multiple colors, and challenging blocks to deal with is part of it. There are barrier blocks that have to be used as the end of a line, and directional blocks that force the next move in that direction. There’s also portals. Yes, now we’re thinking with portals.

The game’s style can be best compared to the iOS game Puzzlejuice (which should really come to Android at some point), in both its visual aesthetic and occasional smarminess toward the player. There are a lot of levels here as well, several hundred from what it appears. For those ready to get lost in this game, there’s a labyrinth of content. No minotaurs, hopefully. There’s plenty of variety, and the harder puzzles really are brain-teasers. And there are a lot of them. And if they’re not enough, there’s a custom level creator in there too.

The controls make it easy to go back to the exact previous point in drawing the line, though an acciedental touch can also erase much hard-earned progress. While the normal reaction would be to just say “just draw it again” the problem is that because there’s often complex paths involved, it’s sometimes not that easy. Just be careful. Also, the game is probably best enjoyed by not going at a linear pace. The starter levels introduce much of what is needed to know to play Huebrix, but at that point it’s better to go and find a set of levels with difficulty that’s satisfying to play on, and bounce around from there. It’s just a lot more variety. Also, an easy way to reset the timer to zero when going for medals, without having to go into the pause menu, would be most welcome.

Huebrix’s massive amount of content at a cost of $1 is an absolute steal for those who want a puzzle game that can potentially bring them a lot of opportunities to swear at how difficult that one @$#$#@ puzzle is!

Phone Story Review

Phone Story Review

Sep 21, 2011

If the news hits a black hole before it graces your screen, Phone Story comes with quite a bit of hype around it, and not the good kind either. The game was supposed to grace iOS devices last week. But when Apple realized the game was essentially using the manufacturing processes of their hugely popular products as a way to make a political stance against their labor practices, well, Apple was none too pleased. Why Apple did not catch this before it hit the App Store for a short amount of time is baffling. Apple once again shows they do not have a sense of humor when it comes to them being put in a negative spotlight.

So, how is the game that Apple felt a need to pull off the market? Really, it is not that all entertaining or enlightening. Players follow the “life cycle” of phones, or dang near any electronic device really. It starts with an 8-bit like face appearing on the screen saying how it is going to talk about the history of the phone, while providing entertainment. The story starts in the Congo with to force children to mine the metals necessary to start the manufacturing process, all at gun point. From there, the game moves to China, and the player has to save workers from committing suicide by moving a trampoline into place to save the falling workers. After this fiasco, it is time to throw phones at eager customers, and the story ends by recycling and burning various components of the phone. Do keep in mind, the whole time while “playing” the game, a narrator is telling terrible stories about the process, like emphasizing children mining minerals or the hazardous fumes emitting from burning electronic devices.

All these “atrocities” are presented in a 8-bit art style. The visuals are bland with flat colors, lackluster animations, and extremely simplistic sprite design. The voice that is gabbing on and on in each stage sounds like a synthesizer gone awry. It can be hard to understand at times, and the reverb from it is rather annoying. More work could have went into the presentation to make this game stand out, drive the points home, and make players really think about how it is the very phone they are playing on is manufactured.

The story mode takes maybe five minutes to complete, and then an obsolescence mode is unlocked. This mode repeats the four levels over and over, with goals becoming harder to obtain. The only redeeming factor in all this is that the developers are claiming to donate all revenues from the sale of the game to charities working to solve the very issues mentioned in the game.

As a game trying to provide some sort of entertainment, there is not enough substance to warrant a purchase. The political statements it tries to drive home have made news headlines before, and it certainly will not be changing the world. Those that want to see what all the fuss is about while donating to charities, and go in knowing there is not much entertainment value here, can find the game here.