Freaky Friday – Weight On The Moon

Freaky Friday – Weight On The Moon

Aug 12, 2011

This week’s Freaky Friday app hovers around the fringes of actually being pretty interesting. It skirts the border of “huh?” and “ooh!”, never quite managing to build an effective base in either of those two areas. On the one hand, it’s incredibly pointless. It’s also about space, and space is cool.

The app in question is Weight On The Moon, and it does precisely what it says on the digital tin. It tells you what your weight would be on the moon. Not just that, it also tells you what your weight would be on the seven other planets in the solar system, as well as Pluto, which isn’t a planet any more, and the sun. Which is the sun.

You type your “earth weight” into the app and it produces a number in a flash to let you know what you’d weigh on the heavenly body of your choosing. The problem is, it doesn’t tell you what unit of measurement it’s using. Pounds and stone, kilos and grammes, knives and forks? The app’s also a bit of an uggo, although by the standards usually set by entrants to the Freaky Friday hall of shame, it’s the Mona Lisa.

With a bit of spit and polish, Weight On The Moon would be a pretty nice app. Certainly not one you’d be ashamed to whip out and wave in front of your friends at those high class dinner parties you almost certainly never get invited to.

The problem is, you’d only whip it out once. “Hey guys, look at this, I can tell you how much you weight on the moon!” Your audience will no doubt be suitably rapt, and have a good giggle for all of a minute. If you ever, ever try it again though, you’ll just become the moon weight guy, shunned in polite society and made to go and sit on your own in the corner and talk about your boring space mularkey.

Don’t be the moon guy. Don’t ever be the moon guy.

Weight On The Moon is available now, for free, from the Android Market

Freaky Friday – Golf Photo Taker

Freaky Friday – Golf Photo Taker

Jun 3, 2011

The thing with hobbies, is that once you get deep enough into them, you just can’t help yourself. You have to buy the right shoes, the right hats, the right equipment, otherwise your hobby engaging friends will laugh at you and call you names. Nowadays, that list includes having the right apps too.

Of course, it’s all a con. Merchandisers slap names and logos on any old tat and, because you’re desperate to keep up with the trends, you buy them. And yes, Golf Photo Taker, I am very definitely looking at you when I say that. For shame.

Golf Photo Taker does exactly what you’d expect an app called Golf Photo Taker to do. It takes photos of people playing golf. Well, actually, it doesn’t take photos, you do, it just adds a frame. A golfing related frame. And that’s it.

Except, that’s not it. The app also sends you text messages, from yourself, recommending other golfing, picture taking and entirely unrelated apps. Which is so annoying that it resulted, in my case at least, in an instant uninstall.

Golf Photo Taker is a stupid app, with no redeeming features. It makes it onto our driving range of despair because it’s hideous, pointless, and for some reason has a picture of someone’s Facebook profile as one of its screenshots on the Android Market.

The sad fact is, people are going to buy Golf Photo Taker. About a hundred people already have. Someone has even given it a five star review. Five stars for what is, to all intents and purposes, a digital version of holding a bit of cardboard in front of your camera.

Don’t buy Golf Photo Taker, don’t even think about buying Golf Photo Taker. If you want to take photos of yourself or other people playing golf, then by all means, do so. There’s a camera on your phone that will do a lovely job. Or buy a camera. Just avoid this creepy, intrusive, utterly useless sham of an app.

Golf Photo Taker is available now from the Android Market.